My wedding: Been there, done that

Orginal blog at http://www.beloblog.com/KHOU_weddingbelles/2008/08/my-wedding-been-there-done-tha.html#more

After months and months of planning, my big day has come and gone.

There were no major freak-outs. There were no epic catastrophes. There wasn't even a cloud in the sky.

Here comes the ... me!

It. Was. Perfect.

I thought I might come out of it feeling different, but no.

I'm just the same old me with a different name and another ring on my finger.

And I couldn't be happier about it.

So as an old married lady who's been there and done that, I offer my Top Five Things You've Always Wanted to Know About Your Wedding but Were Afraid to Ask:

1) Pony up that cash, lady. In the world of weddings, you get what you pay for. So if you're on a budget, it's important to focus on the things that will serve you best in the end. The most important of these, I think, is the photographer. (The least important? FAVORS!!!) We flew my fab photog, Winn Fuqua, to San Diego from Dallas to capture my big day on film. Good photographers cost some crazy cash, but they're worth it. After the whole shebang has ... uhh ... shebanged, all you'll have left are those pictures. Consider it an investment in your memory bank. Hahaha. Puns are awesome.

2) Wedding coordinators are your friend. It's another area where brides are often tempted to skimp, but if you're doing a destination wedding like I did, they are a lifesaver. That is why Jessica Gillon of Events By Design is my superhero. When you're trying to plan a wedding in an unfamiliar place, it's crucial to have someone with local ties. And the last thing a bride needs to do on her big day is freak out about, oh, say, a group of people putting up a hideous beach tent ten feet from the site of your ceremony. When bad stuff like that happens, your wedding coordinator will swoop in like Wonder Woman and take care of bidness for you. Plus, the pros will have ideas that you'll never think of, and if they're good at their jobs, they can even help you cut costs without skimping on style.

3) Take it easy. You've got to remember the reason you're there: To marry the guy or gal of your dreams!!! If you don't enjoy this day, you're wasting a lot of time and money. So when, perchance, a group of people put a hideous beach tent up ten feet from the site of your ceremony with screaming children and kites and music (this could be even more awkward for, say, a church wedding in Des Moines), you can't let it get to you. Delegate the disasters to someone else (read: your wedding coordinator or a bridesmaid) and let yourself be free to be the bride. It will be over before you know it, and you'll be sad if you don't make the most of your moment.

4) In the event that a group of people put a hideous beach tent ten feet from the site of your ceremony with screaming children, kites, music, tiki torches, circus animals, noisemakers, guys on stilts, and a helicopter landing pad, don't despair. They will move or die by your hand ... err ... the hand of your wedding coordinator, who may or may not be as beautiful as Aphrodite, wise as Athena, swifter than Hermes and stronger than Hercules.

5) Get your hairs did, girl. Seriously. As budget-friendly as it might be to do it yourself, professional hair and makeup makes a BIG difference in your pictures. We threw a spa day for my maids and moms at our resort, and it was worth every penny. My makeup artist and hairstylist made me have the sexy. For me, getting a mini-makeover made the whole day seem a little more special. I didn't want to walk down the aisle looking like I normally do: A freckled chick who may or may not have brushed her hair that day and has mascara smudged on her face. I suggest you do the same.

And since I feel my unfazed wedding demeanor was a performance that deserves recognition by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, I've compiled a list of people to thank for my big day.

I am forever indebted to the following folks: Jessica, Gopala, Winn, Laura, Debbie and everyone else at Essence, the Hilton San Diego Resort staff, Pastor Jon, Don, Joe, Jon the DJ, Shirley, Mom, Bette, Tommy, Jesse, Hannah, Billy, Sarah, Kim, Amie, Donnie, Adam, Jeff, Tyson, Matt, Sloan, the rest of my family and friends who made the trip, my husband (!) and most of all, my dad. Love ya'll, and thanks for getting the &*#!%?! tent out of the way!